Before a difficult conversation

Before a difficult conversation. You have a conversation coming that you are not looking forward to. With a parent, a partner, a boss, a friend. This track is for the few minutes before you walk in. Sit or stand, whichever you can do where you are. Eyes closed, or resting on one spot.

Start with the body. Feel your feet on the floor. Press them down a little.

Drop the shoulders. Loosen the jaw. Let the hands open.

One long breath out, through the mouth, as if you are cooling something hot.

Again.

Now ask yourself one question. What matters most to me in this conversation? Not all of what you want to say. The one thing. Put it in one sentence, in your head.

Say that sentence to yourself once more, slowly.

Next. Decide what you will not do. Maybe: I will not raise my voice. Or: I will not bring up the old thing. Or: I will not agree just to end it. Choose one.

You do not get to decide how the other person behaves. You do get to decide this one thing. Keep it.

The conversation may not go the way you want. That is allowed. Your job is to say your one sentence and keep your one promise to yourself. The rest is not in your hands.

If the heat rises in the middle of it, feet on the floor, and one long breath out. You can do that quietly.

Notice how the body feels now, compared to when you started.

One more slow breath out before you go.

Open your eyes if they were closed. Look around. Then walk in.